WHY POLYGAMY
I was asked a question about marriage in Islam and why it allows four wives. I told them that the reason is that the ratio of women to men was great and other rational reasons, but then they asked me why Allah created only one woman Hawa' (Eve) for Adam (peace be upon him). I would very much like it, if you gave me a logical answer to this very question I was asked. Jazakum Allahu khayran. Salam - Amina.
Salam,
Thank you for your question.
There are three parts to your question:
1. The question of why Allah created one woman only for Adam (peace be upon him).
2. The claim that polygamy in Islam is related to the non-balanced ratio between men and women.
3. Whether polygamy is necessarily part of the law that people have to practice.
First of all, in the Muslim scripts (Qur'an and Hadith), we do not have answers for the question of "
why polygamy?" stated clearly. This means that the answer anyone gives to the question of polygamy, including my answer here, is a matter of speculated interpretation.
And when we give answers based on such interpretations, we should make sure that we inform the people we talk with (especially if they are not Muslim) that we are giving our own interpretations and not what Allah stated in His book as His own reasons. And the rationale is clear: If the facts, which we based our interpretations on, turn out to be inaccurate, then people will think that Allah's scripts, not our opinions, are inaccurate. So, we have to make a clear distinction between Allah's reasons and our own.
Similarly, we can answer a question of "why" in Allah's creation with certainty, only if He reveals His reasons to us. There are no direct reasons given in the scripts for "why" Allah created only one mate for Adam.
However, if we refer to the verses that mentioned the creation of a "mate" for Adam, we will notice certain implications of the words and expressions used in the verses. And yes, the following is a matter of interpretation.
Read the following verses
*{O mankind! Be conscious of your Sustainer, who has created you out of one living entity, and out of it created its mate, and out of the two spread abroad a multitude of men and women.}* (An-Nisaa' 4:1)
*{It is He who has created you [all] out of one living entity, and out of it brought into being its mate, so that man might incline [with love] towards woman. And so, when he has embraced her, she conceives [what at first is] a light burden, and continues to bear it. Then, when she grows heavy [with child], they both call unto God, their Sustainer, "If Thou indeed grant us a sound [child], we shall most certainly be among the grateful!"}* (Al-A`raf 7:189)
*{He has created you [all] out of one living entity, and out of it fashioned its mate.}* (Az-Zumar 39:6)
The expression that is consistently used in the verses is "zawjaha" (Adam's mate) and not "zawjan lahu" (one mate for Adam), and the second verse quoted above states that "so that he (Adam) might incline to her with love". This means that the "natural" situation for a human being (nafs, whether man or woman) is to incline and love one mate and not more.
This is how Adam was created, and it is certainly more accurate to refer to Adam's creation for discovering the nature of human beings more than any other statistical reference that could differ along the dimensions of geography and history.
In fact, "nature" and "naturally" are such complex words because they are often confused with the words "culture" and "culturally". So you find some people claiming that certain things are human "nature" and they are only really referring to their own "culture" as a reference for this "nature".
The point is that the default and natural creation of human beings is to incline emotionally to one person and "out of the two spread men and women" as the verse is saying. This is the default and natural family structure: man, woman, and their children. Any other form of "family" is a matter of culture that is formed despite humanity's natural inclinations.
In my personal view, many of the "reasons" that people mention behind the Islamic law allowing a man to marry more than one wife are unfounded, apologetic, and even men-serving.
For example, people say that, "men are "naturally" inclined to sexual activities more than women", "the number of men is statistically more than the number of women", "the second is meant to be a friend for the first wife, and the whole family will live happily ever after", and so on.
If we examine these claims mentioned here via modern social sciences tools, we will realize that they are simply inaccurate; and if they happen to apply to a certain society or community in a certain country or time, they do not apply as "universal" human facts based upon what a law could be based on. Here, "universal" is also as big a claim as "natural".
There is another dimension to polygamy that we have to consider, which is the dimension of `urf (tradition or culture). Speaking from a jurisprudential standpoint, traditions of the people do have an effect on Islamic rulings and do affect people's contracts and worldly dealings in general as long as they do not contradict the rules of Shari`ah.
In Islamic law, the rule goes that what is default according to tradition is a default condition in the contract. This means that if the tradition of the people (or perhaps the agreement of the couple before marriage) indicates that the man will not marry any other women, then it goes as a "legal condition" in the marriage contract that is abiding to that man, unless his wife (or perhaps a judge in certain cases) willfully allows this default to change.
The question now is: Could Muslims add conditions such as monogamy to legal contracts? And the answer is yes, according to all Islamic schools of law.
Therefore, if the tradition of the husband and wife view monogamy as the normal and default, then they should apply it, because as we said, what is a default according to tradition is a default condition in the contract.
Some societies, especially in the West, do not accept polygamy and find it harmful for the make up of the family and society. Therefore, it is unfair to Islam to tell these societies that polygamy is part of "Islam" that they have to practice!
We do not want to tie people's acceptance of Islam to practicing polygamy, because they do not have to. It is mentioned in the Qur'an, which is true, but practicing it is subject to people's perception of the family. Our legal evidence is that the first family of Adam and Eve, according to the Qur'an, was monogamous.
Allah Almighty is the creator of all the human beings. He knows what is good and what is bad for them. He also knows their particular needs. He says what means:
*{Does He not know, Who created? And He is the Knower of the subtleties, the Aware.}* (Al-Mulk 67:14)
Allah Almighty also says what means:
*{And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice [between them], then [marry] only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course.}* (An-Nisaa' 4:3)
It is important to note that polygamy is only allowed and not urged to be done. When the West talks about polygamy in Islam, they refer to it as something weird and should not be valid in the human's nature. However, polygamy was known from the very first day of existence of mankind on Earth. Neither, Jewish nor Christians forbid polygamy. On the contrary, the prophets of the Jews and Christians were known as polygamous. For example, King Sulayman (Solomon) is said to have had seven hundred wives and three hundred concubines. Dawud (David) had ninety-nine and Ya`qub (Jacob) had four. Christianity, as well didn't forbid polygamy at all, as there is no single word banning polygamy in their scripts. How would polygamy in Islam be unfair to women? Islam, as mentioned above, didn't urge men to become polygamous, it only allowed it for certain purposes. Justice among wives is a clear restricted condition on the Muslim man who wants to marry another wife. That is clearly stated in the verse mentioned above (An-Nisaa' 4:3). Whereas the West which is arrogantly refusing polygamy has different types of it, some of them are dangerous either psychologically or even physically for the society as a whole. Types of polygamy known in the West: Actually there are three kinds of polygamy practiced in Western societies:
Serial polygamy, that is, marriage, divorce, marriage, divorce and so on any number of times.
A man married to one woman but having and supporting one or more mistresses.
An unmarried man having a number of mistresses.
Islam condones but discourages the first and forbids the other two. Do you really think brother Tarek that polygamy is unjust to women in Islam? Or is it the real inequality to talk about the three previously listed kinds?
In her book The Life and Teachings of Muhammed, Dr. Annie Besant says: "There is pretended monogamy in the West, but in reality, there is polygamy without responsibility; the mistress is cast off when the man is weary of her ... the first lover has no responsibility for her future, and she is a hundred times worst off then the sheltered wife in a polygamous home." "When we see thousands of miserable women who crowd the streets of Western towns during the night, we must surely feel that it does not lie in the Western mouth to reproach Islam for polygamy. It is better for woman, happier for woman, more respectable for woman to live in polygamy, united to one man, only with a legitimate child in her arms and surrounded with respect, than to be seduced and then cast out into the streets, perhaps with illegitimate child outside the rule of law, uncared, unsheltered, to become victim of any passer-by, night after night, rendered incapable of motherhood, despised by all."
Polygamy: Why Is It Permitted in Islam?
Islam is a way of life consonant with nature, providing human solutions to complex situations and avoiding extremes. This characteristic of Islam can be observed most clearly in its stand concerning the taking of more than one wife. Islam permits the Muslim to marry more than one woman in order to resolve some very pressing human problems, individual as well as social.
In his answer to the question in point, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Muhammad Al-Hanooti, member of the North American Fiqh Council, states: "First, understanding Islam is based on wahy (revelation) rather than reason. The principle of reason is used to further understand the wahy but not to judge or rule. Second, the majority of Prophets were married to many wives, whereas they are considered the models for humanity for every sort of activity or style of life. Third, in reality, you can hardly find one Muslim out of tens-of-thousands who is married to more than one wife. But, he cannot have affairs or dating with any woman. In non-Muslim societies, more than 65% of married men have affairs with more than 2, 3 or 4 women.
There are more than 45% of women who have affairs the same way outside of marriage. All these practices are correct for the people of reason. They admit any zina (fornication/adultery) but they don't admit any alternative for keeping people in cleanliness and pure solutions. Fourth, if you want a woman to marry more than one man, this is not the only misconception we hear from people who allege they are people of reason and intellect.
But I don't need to make any comment other than saying this question is answered by what Allah, the Creator, has made of laws. He knows the best what is convenient and what is inconvenient for man or woman." Shedding more light on why Islam allows polygamy, the European Council for Fatwa and Research issued the following Fatwa: "Prior to Islam, men used to marry as many women as they wished without any limits nor conditions. When Islam was revealed, it prescribed a limit to the number of women one may marry and also placed conditions for this to take place. As for the limit, Islam prescribed that the maximum number of women a man can marry is four, as stated in the Qur'an: "Marry women of your choice, two or three or four..." (An-Nisa': 3)
As for the condition, it is the confidence of the man that he can actually be totally just and fair between his wives, otherwise he is not allowed to re-marry. The Qur'an stated: "...but if you fear that you will not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one..." (An-Nisa': 3)
In addition, the other conditions of any marriage must also be present, such as the ability to provide for the family and the ability to satisfy the sexual needs of the woman. The reason for the allowance for a man to marry more than one woman is because Islam is a realistic religion and one which is not based upon idealistic notions which would cause real problems of everyday life without solution or treatment. It is very probable that a man marrying a second wife could be solving a problem, in that his first wife is incapable of bearing children or has extended menstruation cycles which result in his sexual needs being unsatisfied. The first wife could be ill and thus, instead of divorcing her and leaving her alone, could marry a second wife and remain next to his first wife, and so on. This allowance also solves the problem of a widow who needs a husband to care for her but does not wish for an unmarried young man, similar to a divorced woman with children. Indeed this allowance may solve a social problem which arises from the high proportion of good women who want to marry in comparison to able men. This is a common problem which increases particularly in the aftermath of wars and the like. The fact, in this case, is that the extra women do one of three following options: 1) That they remain unmarried for the rest of their lives, and are thus deprived from being a wife and a mother, which is a great injustice.
2) That they fulfill their sexual needs regardless of decrees of religion and acceptable behavior, which will result in a tragic loss in this life and the hereafter.
3) That they agree to marry an already married man who is capable of meeting their living and sexual needs and who is confident in his ability to deal fairly and justly between his wives. As for those who say that this allowance is often abused by some men, it is an unfortunate fact that many rights are abused or are used in inappropriate manners. This does not mean that we must cancel these rights. Indeed, there are many men who abuse their first and only wives, so does this lead us to cancel marriage in its entirety? Freedoms are often abused. Should we cancel freedoms? We see that states and governments abuse elections; would it be right to cancel these processes? In fact we find that authority and government is frequently abused, so would it be acceptable to cancel authority and let society decline into a state of chaos? It would be better, instead of calling for the cancellation of these rights, to set up boundaries and regulations which would limit the possibility of such rights being abused."
sources : Islam online.net
